Wet, Gray Days

 

I took this picture two weeks ago from our living room window when we had a cold snap here and temperatures were "minus" as they call them here (29 degrees). It was taken at 3pm and was obviously foggy and almost dark already.

Today is not nearly that cold, but it is a wet, gray day and it was dark by 4pm. Amy and I keep trying to adjust to the short days, but it keeps catching us off guard and we think it's later than it is.

We look forward to the spring and summer when the daylight hours will be much longer!

Emily's Nativity Play

December 19 was Emily's last day of school in 2012 and her class put on a nativity play for all of the parents and grandparents. She was an angel and did a great job singing the songs that they (we all!) had been practicing for the last month.

Thankfully, Amy found a costume at a store and we didn't have to get creative with a pillowcase or bedsheet!  Anyway, we thought we'd share some of the pictures from that day:

Here's the scene in her classroom...

 

As expected, it was a little chaotic at times with some of the angels roaming. Also you might notice that Emily (top left) brought her own baby doll to hold throughout the play. Thankfully, Mary did not feel too threatened.

 

Here's Emily with one of her friends, Paige, having fun afterwards!

This above is Ms. Ciara, the trained montessori teacher for Emily, who has been helping Emily learn to write her name, among many other things!

Here's Miss Abbie, who is great with Emily and leads the kids in lots of fun songs and activities.

And this is Ms. Angie, the lead teacher, who has been very good at helping Emily to feel more comfortable at school this fall.

And here's our little angel excited about the party and snacks after the play!

 

Here are a couple of videos too - one of the kids singing "I Have Come with Special News" and the next one of Emily playing with others in the hay and straw.

 

 

 



Bonding with the British

As the new year approaches, I reflect on these first three months here and how it has been a roller coaster of emotions. Excitement, disappointment, confusion, contentment, sorrow, fear, and hope. There is so much to process and learn in a new culture and society, even one that speaks English!

 

One thing that has been key for us in this initial season of transition has been bonding with the people and culture here. Tom and Elizabeth Brewster wrote an incredible article/book called Bonding and the Missionary Task on the importance of assimilating into another culture in cross-cultural ministry, likening it to the bonding that occurs between a mother and child immediately after the birth. The first days and weeks are critical for a strong connection to be made and deep, lasting relationships with locals can emerge from that bond that was formed.

 

I am thankful that we ventured out in and around Oxford every day those first days and weeks. We bought long-term bus passes. We ate at local restaurants and cafes. We asked a lot of questions. We learned to stop by the grocery store daily to buy little amounts of food for the next day or two, instead of stocking up once a week like in the States. We committed to live like the people here as best we could. We did our best to not import our American expectations, and we desired to connect and bond with the rhythm and pace of the British life.  

 

Now it wasn't always easy. We got confused and frustrated at times. Things here didn't always make sense to us. Even though we don't have to learn a new language, it is a different culture. It's been challenging and painful at times to make this transition and try to identify with the people here and know how to navigate through daily life.

 

The English are not the easiest and most open to strangers, and yet we have experienced great kindness and hospitality in our short time here already. Getting connected to a local church and into a small group has helped to provide us with a believing community. Other friends we have made have reached out to us and encouraged us in this transition.

 

We have had some extremely tough days and moments here. Yet, Amy and I both comment on how we feel like we have been here longer than we have (in a good way). And I think that I feel that way because in many ways I do feel comfortable here. I have that sense of belonging already to some degree. Now don't get me wrong - I am by no means pretending to be British and do miss things back in America, but living here has grown on me.

 

The best part is seeing how the Lord is connecting me/us with others in the community here and the new friendships we are making. I know these relationships will be important to our long-term success and ability to thrive in life and ministry in Oxford this next year. Now that I am feeling more a part of society here, I'm excited to see what's next.

 

 



Emily at School

Back in October we were excited to find the Summertown Montessori nursery that seemed like a great fit for Emily. She goes three days a week (Monday, Wednesday, Friday) from 8:30am - 1:00pm. It's about an 8 minute walk down Banbury Road from our apartment, so it's nice and close.

The school meets in the lower level of this church hall located just north of the Summertown shops. Here's a picture of the church hall:

Each school day we get Emily's lunch box packed and her backpack ready.

Here's our girl ready to go!

 

"See my pink backpack, Dad?!!" (Thanks Grandy and Ellie!)

 

There are about 20 kids from literally all over the world in her class with her - some from Spain, Norway, Brazil, and Zambia (there's a lot of international students at Oxford). Most of the kids though are British and there are a few other Americans.

The kids do circle time with songs and activities, individual time learning with a Montessori-certified teacher (Miss Ciara whom Emily calls Miss Cara), free play, and outside time in the garden. It seems to have a very good pace and rhythm for her age group.

Here's Emily painting her hand with Miss Abbie, one of her main teachers. Emily has started to say some words with a British accent, and uses words like "straightaway" and "rubbish" all the time.

 

Every other week, an outside music teacher comes to teach song and dance. Sophie (the music teacher) and Ralph (her stuffed animal dog) lead the kids in lots of fun music activities like playing with this parachute while they sing.

Here's Ms. Angie (another of her main teachers) reading Goldilocks to the children during storytime:

 

Snack time each morning before they go out into the garden...

 

 

Here's our "cheeky monkey" (her teachers call the kids that all the time actually) out in the garden on the cross statue. Usually they have bikes and equipment (slides, etc.) for the kids to play on. If the weather is too cold or wet, they'll build an obstacle course inside the room to help Emily and her friends get their energy out!

 

As Amy mentioned in a previous post, Emily did struggle with this transition initially, saying that she didn't want to go to school, and crying at dropoff in the morning. We knew separation anxiety is a real thing, but she had done very well at pre-school in the U.S. last year. However we realized that this behavior was intensified by culture shock and all the change of moving to another country.

 

After a month, thankfully she started to feel more comfortable going to school and now has become friends with some of the other kids. Some of her friends she talks most about are: Paige, Knox, Ella, Gabriela, and Nico.  

 

Her teachers say she is doing "brilliant," and she has even started writing her first name now thanks to what she's learning at school! We are blessed by our clever little "cheeky monkey!"

 

 

Thanksgiving Art by Emily

Emily made a picture for Thanksgiving too, using some Thanksgiving stickers she'd gotten from NaiNai (thanks NaiNai!). We traced her hand and made a turkey and she did everything except the outline of the hat and the eyes and then I filled in the wattle under the chin so it was easier to see.

If you look closely enough, Emily also wrote her first name in the top left corner! She's been practicing that at school and surprised us with that last week! It is faint, but you might be able to see it. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

An Oxford Thanksgiving

Last week was Thanksgiving, and I have to say it was a little strange that it was just another Thursday here in England. There are enough Americans here that people know about it, but the British just don't celebrate it.

Actually, several British friends mentioned to me that they think it is a great idea for a holiday and said they wished they had a similar holiday.

We certainly missed our family during this time, but we made the most of it. We did not have our Thanksgiving meal on Thursday because of Amy's class schedule, but we did go to a "Thanksgiving Tea" with some new American friends. It was fun to be with new friends and celebrate British-style with finger foods and tea and coffee. There were several kids there too, so Emily had a lot of fun.

Then on Saturday we had our family meal. I had gone to the local butcher down the street and found a turkey for us - topped with bacon for some good flavor - so that was a fun cultural experience. We put together the rest of the sides, but were not able to pull together ingredients in time for a pumpkin pie or pecan pie. But, we still managed just fine as you'll see below.

When I look back on the past year, it is easy to see how much we have to be thankful for. It was a year ago that the Lord began to nudge and encourage us to take the first steps in this journey of faith to be cross-cultural witnesses. Since then we have seen His faithfulness and provision at work in our lives time and time again, and it is humbling to sit here at this desk in Oxford today and know how far the Lord has brought us on this journey. The most exciting part is this is still just the beginning and we are thankful for what is on the horizon, and most of all for Who is with us every step of the way.

 Here's Amy preparing her family's famous brown rice for our meal...

 

Here's our table with the turkey, gravy, asparagus, brown rice, bread, and smashed potatoes...

 

 

This was dessert...

Here's our first attempt at the family picture, but, as you can tell, Emily was ready to eat not take a picture!

So we tried it again...

 

 

 

One Step at a Time

Emily just asked to go to bed at 6:20pm, so this gives me a chance to write a blog post!  Ah, the benefits of dropping the nap!  Maybe it is also because it starts getting dark here at 4pm, so by 6pm, her body is telling her it's time to sleep.  Actually, mine is too, so maybe that's not so good!

I was reminded the other day of an earlier blog post where I realized that helping Emily through this transition was how I was going to get through it myself, and I am finding that to be true again.

Emily's had a rough start to preschool.  It was a bit unexpected considering that she went last year in the States and loved it!  But we know that EVERYTHING in her life has changed in the last few months, so leaving her at a new preschool was proving traumatic.

After the first few weeks, she seemed to be improving while she was actually at school, according to her teachers.  But the mornings at home were getting harder.  As soon as she woke up and asked if she was going to school, she would start crying and wailing about how she didn't want to go.  We felt so torn about whether we were doing the right thing or not.  Are we missing something?  Is there something about her school that is not right?  It was very confusing.

One morning, she had started crying and ran back to her room after discovering that it was a school day, so I decided to go in there and lay with her for awhile.  Maybe I could figure out what was going on.  The main thing that she would say was how she was going to miss Daddy!  I think Daddy makes her days at home so much fun that she didn't like the thought of having to leave him!

So through the Lord's wisdom, I said, "Okay, let's just take this one step at a time.  Let's not worry about leaving Daddy yet.  Maybe we should just get dressed first."  So we started going through the "checklist" of what needed to be done before she could leave, and it completely changed her attitude!  Suddenly, this was not so overwhelming anymore.  It felt much easier!

As I thought more about it, I couldn't help but smile realizing that this is exactly how the Lord deals with me!  Johnny's general disposition to the world is "Everything will work out alright!"  And mine is to fret and worry and try to figure it all out ahead of time.  But through this transition, the Lord has been teaching me that really I just have to take things one step at a time.  Just deal with what is right in front of me.  Otherwise, it's going to paralyze me, and nothing will get done. 

So as Emily and I go through the "checklist" on the mornings of her school days, I am reminded to do the same with myself.  Try not to rush ahead.  What is right in front of me today that I need to do?  No, I don't know how it's all going to work out or get done, but worrying about it is not going to help anything.  I can pretty much hear the Lord whispering to me, "Let's just take it one step at a time!"